


Hawke's Mind Is Firm

by Musashi



Category: Dragon Age II
Genre: AU, Drawing Room Theatre, M/M, Post-"Alone", comedy of manners, silliness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-06
Updated: 2013-04-06
Packaged: 2017-12-07 15:35:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,714
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/750142
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Musashi/pseuds/Musashi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A One-Act Play In Which Hawke Attempts to Make Fenris See Reason</p><p> </p><p>(Deliberately non-canon, Bertie Woosterish Hawke tries to convince Fenris that the elf would probably be less broody if he were with someone else.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hawke's Mind Is Firm

The setting is a well-appointed drawing-room in a country manor house. Light from the window indicates very late afternoon, in early spring. A delightful fire is in the grate. Two deep, leather club chairs are before the fire, a small table with ashtray between them. Fenris is standing by a drinks cart, where Hawke is mixing cocktails. They are dressed for dinner. The others of the weekend party are not expected to be coming down for some time. 

When Hawke is finished with his mixing, the two men move to the chairs and sit.

Hawke: Here, try this. A new concoction.

Fenris: [accepts glass with a bow, then sips] Absinthe and _coffee_?

Hawke: Another winner, what? [clears throat] Fenris, if you would hear me out on something.

Fenris: I am at your disposal.

Hawke: I would like, if I could, to put something before you. 

Fenris: Of course, my friend.

Hawke: It’s just that, well, here’s the thing.

Fenris: [removes a cigarette from case with exaggerated patience]

Hawke: And before I begin, may I say-- 

Fenris: [exhales cigarette smoke with the merest sigh]

Hawke: --that it is not my desire to debate, or even discuss. I simply wish to deliver a decision.

Fenris: I see. Nothing I have to say will be of any consequence. Your mind is firm.

Hawke: And your mind is set on "receive only"?

Fenris: It is. I shall listen passively.

Hawke: Excellent. Then here I go.

Fenris: [silent but smoking thoughtfully]

Hawke: May I begin?

Fenris: [silent]

Hawke: You can say _something_ , you know. 

Fenris: Are you certain it will not throw you from your horse?

Hawke: Quite certain.

Fenris: A question does spring to mind, as it happens.

Hawke: Please.

Fenris: While receiving your proclamation, do I have permission to ask for clarification when needed?

Hawke: [after considering a moment] As long as the inquiry is in good faith.

Fenris: That is to say, no sarcasm, and no shining the light of logic on dim reasoning. Just listen with the purpose of understanding.

Hawke: Your restraint will be most appreciated.

Fenris: And what of nonverbal communication? 

Hawke: How’s that?

Fenris: I assume you would prefer not to see any physical manifestation of my thoughts.

Hawke: You have a point. Perhaps you would prefer to stand behind me, in the event that you are unable to control your reactions.

Fenris: I may move to such a position, once we have begun, if I sense my mask slipping.

Hawke: Excellent. Yes, well, I shall begin.

Fenris: [silently smokes]

Hawke: I have been thinking about why you left me three years ago. And why, three days ago, you came back.

Fenris: [no change in position, expression or actions]

Hawke: I never quite understood why you felt we could not be together. At the time, you said physical and emotional intimacy were too painful and upsetting.

Fenris: [still nothing]

Hawke: [clears throat or something like that] Er, Fenris, old chap, you can, you know, give a bit of feedback, grease the wheels of conversation, as it were. Something on the order of “I see” or “So I did” would not be amiss.

Fenris: I was led to believe that this was not to be a two-way interaction. 

Hawke: Please adjust that belief, then, and facilitate my efforts.

Fenris: As you wish. May I suggest we return to “At the time, you said…" and take another stab at it?

Hawke: Capital idea.

Fenris: [nods encouragement]

Hawke: _At the time_ , you said it was too painful and upsetting to engage in physical and emotional intimacy.

Fenris: _So I did._

Hawke: [smiles with approval] 

Fenris: [nods cooperatively]

Hawke: But now, you come back, all demons exorcised by the death of the devil himself, Danarius.

Fenris: [taps an ash into the ashtray]

Hawke: And then you tell me that, in truth, you left me three years ago because you had no faith in yourself to be in a relationship. You did not trust that you could be a good partner, so you walked out.

Fenris: So I did.

Hawke: I have come to a similar conclusion about myself.

Fenris: Meaning?

Hawke: I cannot make you happy. 

Fenris: [inhales]

Hawke: I’m not a suitable partner for you.

Fenris: [exhales]

Hawke: You need to find someone who deserves you, is worthy of you, and whom you respect.

Fenris: [nothing]

Hawke: So… 

Fenris: [grinds cigarette into the ashtray]

Hawke: …thank you for hearing me out.

Fenris: You are most welcome.

Hawke: But… aren’t you going to say anything?

Fenris: You indicated at the start that there would be no point in doing so.

Hawke: Yes, but… 

Fenris: And that any contribution I might make to the discussion would be disruptive.

Hawke: Well, yes, but, see here! I find now that it might be more satisfactory if you _did_ add your thoughts.

Fenris: I see. I shall oblige.

Hawke: What do you say I go back to, _You need someone who_?

Fenris: A fine choice.

Hawke: Very well. You need to find someone who deserves you, is worthy of you, and whom you respect.

Fenris: You will do nicely, in all three regards.

Hawke: No. I’m sorry, but no. I don’t believe there is any point in continuing our relationship.

Fenris: I see.

Hawke: [looks pleadingly, desperately, at Fenris, but gets no more reaction]

Hawke: I could have written, I suppose, or asked one of our companions to relay my decision, you know.

Fenris: So this has been a courtesy, as you see it.

Hawke: Quite so. Not to mention I may have come out looking quite the coward if I couldn't face you.

Fenris: That would be awkward, indeed. 

Hawke: Thank you for understanding.

Fenris: Is this to take effect immediately?

Hawke: Yes… Unless you…?

Fenris: No, no, if that is your wish. 

Hawke: Right… One more cocktail before the others join us?

Fenris: Lovely. A _traditional_ absinthe, if you are taking requests.

Hawke mixes drinks and returns to his chair. Fenris lights another cigarette.

Hawke: I must say, you’re taking it incredibly well.

Fenris: [shrugs]

Hawke: I was anticipating more of a battle, I suppose.

Fenris: [sips the fresh cocktail]

Hawke: Right. Well, cheers, then.

A clink of glasses.

Fenris: [after sipping] Is it possible, my dear Hawke, that you are punishing me?

Hawke: Eh?

Fenris: Are you doing this to make me suffer?

Hawke: That is not my intention, no.

Fenris: Just what is your intention, then?

Hawke: To set you free to find happiness. You will not find it here.

Fenris: You are incapable of making me happy?

Hawke: That is correct.

Fenris: Or maybe…

Hawke: Yes?

Fenris: Maybe you believe that I am incapable of experiencing happiness, and you would prefer to have a partner who is not terminally miserable.

Hawke: No, I believe you can know joy, and love. I’ve imagined it, you with others, with various of our acquaintances. In my dreams, you are always smiling and most content. 

Fenris: While here, in reality, I brood and wallow in self-pity.

Hawke: As you say.

Fenris: One wonders why it is that I am smiling and content only in your imaginings.

Hawke: That is a good question.

Fenris: Perhaps it is how you want to see me, how you want me to be.

Hawke: Not so. I believe I loved you as you were.

Fenris: _Loved_?

Hawke: My apologies if the use of the past tense is disturbing to you.

Fenris: It is something of a shock, yes.

Hawke: In my estimation, it would be counterproductive if I claimed to love you while at the same time ending our relationship. That is all.

Fenris: I understand. The issue of whether or not you are still in love with me is irrelevant. 

Hawke: Yes, precisely. My gratitude for your understanding.

Fenris: And my apologies for interrupting. You were saying that you are not rejecting me for any characteristics I possess or demonstrate.

Hawke: I would agree with that statement, yes.

Fenris: My drinking, my confrontational manner with your friends, my need for solitude, my questionable choices, my colored past… None of those matter to you.

Hawke: I was not overcome by any of those things, no.

Fenris: Rather, you engaged in a fantasy of me with others, and saw a different me in those visions.

Hawke: [nods]

Fenris: Pray tell, what scenarios bring out the best in me?

Hawke: Oh, you know…. 

Fenris: I contend that I do _not_ know.

Hawke: Well, such as wrestling with Cullen in the Templar training yard, fairly whooping with joy when you pin him.

Fenris: [hmmms]

Hawke: Or in the Chapel with Sebastian, on your knees in ecclesiastic ecstasy.

Fenris: Really.

Hawke: Cheerfully shopping with Isabela for fripperies, which you later wear for her pleasure.

Fenris: Come, now!

Hawke: Or, say, if you and Anders—

Fenris: It would be best for you, old boy, if you did not finish that sentence.

Hawke: Er, quite.

Fenris: [stubs out cigarette]

Hawke: So there you have it. You, happy.

Fenris: It occurs to me that nothing you have described precludes us being in a committed relationship.

Hawke: Fenris, perhaps you do not fully appreciate the extent of these fantasies, if you think …

Fenris: And perhaps _you_ have not fully calculated my devotion to you.

Hawke: I, er,…

Fenris: Yes, Hawke?

Hawke: That is,…

Fenris: Take your time.

Hawke: Well, confound it, man!

Fenris: [slowly lights yet another cigarette] Hawke, if it would please you, I will endeavor to indulge your fantasies.

Hawke: Fenris, that is not—

Fenris: But, of course, in order for you to find satisfaction in my sacrifice, you must be present, if not a party to—

Hawke: Stop, please.

Fenris: I shall let you reflect on that. But leave you, I will not.

Hawke: [sighs in frustration] Fine. We shall remain as we are, then.

Fenris: And always shall be.

Hawke: You will continue to be miserable—

Fenris: Perpetually, annoyingly and contentedly miserable.

Hawke: And me—

Fenris: And you?

Hawke: Forever in love…

Fenris: [blows a perfect smoke ring]

Hawke: [ _sotto voce_ ]…against my better reason.

Fenris: Let it go, Hawke.

Hawke: As you wish.

Scene ends with the two men clinking glasses, then waiting in companionable silence for the others to join them for the procession into dinner.


End file.
